Perseverance

This was taken my senior year of high school, right before one of my orchestra concerts. I've been playing violin for about ten years now, and it's one of the few things I have really persevered in, but recently I've really been questioning my motives for putting so much time and effort into what is now such a minor part of my life. Why would I add two extra classes to my already intense workload? Why on earth did I agree to perform a new piece on Monday? 

The only reason I can think of comes from something my teacher from back home once told me. He said that when you first start playing your interest goes up and up and up, but once you reach about eighteen you fall into a violin rut, and you want to quit. But, he said, you will regret it for the rest of your life. Frankly, I don't want to regret anything for the rest of my life, so I've kept playing. 

Senior year, violin was my life. Practicing gave me such a rush; it was amazing to feel my fingers beating out such complicated patterns. It was amazing to hear the beautiful melodies I could make, but all this changed Freshman year of college. I was too busy to practice, and my new teacher and I didn't exactly see eye to eye, so I let I pretty much let it lapse. 

This year, however, I was determined to get back into it. So I auditioned for a new teacher as well as chamber ensamble. I have to say I'm still not 100% sure this was the best idea ever, but my playing has improved a lot much since the beginning of the semester. It was hard, really hard, but it's been worth the effort. At the beginning of the semester, I was ready to quit violin for good. I hated chamber and my lessons required way more effort than I really wanted to give them, but it has been well worth the effort. I practiced last night, and once again I knew that I could make beautiful music.